This guest post is written by Asmita Pradhan as part of the 6th anniversary celebration of my blog.
I hear the word cancer and all I want to do is type nasty words and I am truly bummed because this is really bad.
I lost my grandmother and my ex-boyfriend to cancer and recently, we lost Aruna Ma’am. I didn’t know her, never followed her on Social media even though I did see her tweets often, of course someone retweeted them and I wish I did. One day, #SRKMeetsAruna trended and I really wanted to know what it was about and I am really thankful to him for sending out a message to her. So that is when I found out about her and FUCK, these four letters at the top couldn’t have come out of my mouth any quicker. Fuck you cancer! You took away another good soul. Could you just not take anyone else now? Because it’s horrible to see a life truly disappearing in front of your eyes.
So this post is to all of the friends, family and loved ones of someone with cancer or have lost them: we know how you feel. We understand the sharp pain in your gut, as you are consumed by agony and overwhelmed by a complete loss of control…all while not really knowing if you have the right to feel that way. It’s not you who has cancer. But it is you who has to watch your loved one go through it. It may be a different set of emotions but those emotions are very valid and need to be talked about.
Years and dates are very easy to forget. It’s been almost two years since that day, a day where everything changed so fast, that I felt like I had to sprint just to keep up. The pain might have numbed, but the reality of loss still stings. Yet the life lessons that I’ve learned since that day have been instrumental in my growing as a person. Understanding grief, pain, and understanding growth have all been a part of those hard lessons. In the hope that it might help someone in a similar situation, I wanted to share what I have learned a year after losing a loved one to cancer.
There will also be good, bad, and flat out horrible days. That’s alright, and it’s also okay to miss the one you lost, because you’re making a huge adjustment in living your life, without the physical presence of a loved one. There were days for me where I felt good, where I felt okay, where I was surviving. Then there were the days when I felt pretty terrible about myself and about my life.
It’s hard to want to move on in life, even when it just comes to feeling better for yourself. But I learned, throughout it all, that the ones we love will always want the best for us – even if they have passed away. It’s what keeps me going, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
For anyone that has lost a loved one, at any stage in his or her lives, I hope this brings you peace.
About Asmita –
Asmita is a blogger, and social media enthusiast. She is passionate about reading, good coffee, being outside and believes that we are in the world to do good deed and to grow as much as we can. She writes about her misadventures and travels in the city with some musings about life thrown in for good measure.
She can be contacted on,
Facebook – www.facebook.com/apsster
Twitter – www.twitter.com/apsster
Instagram – www.instagram.com/apsster
Read all posts from the 6th anniversary celebration of the blog – #6YrsOfHappiness